DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
