It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
