Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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