bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
