I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
