what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
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