his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
