I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
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