dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
