I love black thongs
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
