She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
