i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
