Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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