So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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