Moan for me like Helen Keller
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize