she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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