i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize