I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
