no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
My underwear smells like fireworks.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
