please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
