But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
