Having a random hookup so left but love u
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
