i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
