you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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