I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
