he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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