So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
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