I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
