it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
