So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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