I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
