Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
