I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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