Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
