so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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