Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
