She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
