Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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