he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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