I like to think it a success when the cops are called
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize