my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
