i just wanna soil my oats bro
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
