THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
