Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
