you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
