I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
