is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
