She said her name was "party"
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
