So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
