I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
