wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You are a booty call, not a friend.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
